| 12 - I think I should know how to destroy something innocent, without leaving my fingerprints, oh |
[10 Dec 2009|08:50pm] |
I'm going to inspire a change of pace by not just posting a bunch of pictures. I'm going to include a regular entry, too. You're welcome.
I think anybody with eyes noticed that the snow has finally arrived. I can only hope that this is as much as we'll get, but my mom is bemoaning the fact that we could get a foot over the weekend. Everybody knows I hate the cold, right? Yeah. I absolutely despise it. As in I wear two sweaters indoors this time of year. So essentially, I'm in a bitter frozen hell right now.
It doesn't help that my car has decided it wants to stop running forever. I tried to start it yesterday and the engine made a sound like a cat dying. Well, to say the least, something is wrong with the engine. It's in the shop right now, but it sounds like it'll cost more to fix it than the car is actually worth.
So I'm without a way to get around. My mother gave me a bus card and told me to wear a hat. Gee, thanks, mom. That's so helpful...
Shizuka, I might have to take you up on that 'I'll drive you places' offer. Otherwise I'm really going to freeze to death, I have no doubt.
( Private. )
( Private to Lilly. )
While I completely hate this weather, I think Isono is in some kind of dog heaven. I'm kind of worried he's going to freeze to death, but he always wants to be out in the yard, chasing snowflakes and bouncing around in the snow. He's obviously more puppy than anything else, despite his massive size. I usually go out with him, despite my severe intolerance for cold. I couldn't tell you why it makes him so happy, but I'm glad someone is enjoying the weather.
School is little more than torture this semester. Not because it's difficult -- it's just boring. I'm taking AP Government, History, and Statistics. I've already finished both AP English (that was a walk in the park) and Calculus. So, if I did my math right, that should be all of them. It's a little unnecessary to get all these AP classes done before Senior year, some people tell me, but I don't see why not.
I don't see why they get the reputation for being difficult. They're not difficult, per se, just have a lot of homework and writing involved.
Then again, I'm ahead with all my schoolwork. Call me a nerd if you must, but I like getting stuff done early so I can proceed to slack off.
And now that I'm done complaining about the cold, my car, and school, here are some pictures. Just a couple, though.
( Cut. )
Er. I already posted one of me, the one with Lilly, so I don't have to share another, right?
I'm gonna say no, I don't.
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| 11 - The world we knew will never come back. The life we had isn't ours anymore. |
[26 Nov 2009|10:10am] |
Something ... really weird happened this morning. I'm still not sure if I can explain it.
I woke up early -- like, really early. 6AM. No alarm, no dog sitting on my face to get me to let him out. Just... woke up.
And automatically, I got up, and made a pot of coffee. Not normal coffee, either. As dark as physically possible. My mother, who is always up early, came into the kitchen, and couldn't drink the stuff even when she half-diluted it with milk.
She asked me who I made it for, and I told her that it was tradition, to make my 'nii-sama' coffee on Holidays.
She looked at me crazy, and for good reason. Because she doesn't speak Japanese, for one. Nii-sama -- er. It means 'highly respected older brother'. When I explained that, she was even more confused. Because you can't give my brother coffee or he'll be up for weeks. And she also knows I'd never refer to Guy that way.
Automatically she assumed I was sick and wanted me to go back to bed.
It's weird ... I know.
I poured the coffee down the drain. Nobody in the family could drink it.
( Private. )
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. My mother loves this holiday, and since I got up early, she's recruiting me to help cook. I'm on stuffing duty. Chopping celery, apple, and onion. And later she'll have me peeling apples. Possibly until the end of time. I guess it'll be something to do. I've already got most of my homework done.
Lilly? Are we on for Friday? I got the keys, if you still want to go. I'd invite you over for dinner, but I have a feeling your mother will be having some kind of dinner.
I hope everyone is happy and well fed for the holiday. If not on turkey, then whatever will make you happy. I'd be perfectly content with pizza but my mother won't listen to reason.
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| 10 - I'm waiting for the sky to fall, waiting for a sign |
[09 Nov 2009|03:24pm] |
I feel ... really strange today.
Paying attention in class was ridiculously hard difficult. I mean, I get bored during lectures as it is. But seriously... I couldn't even pay attention in History, and that's my favorite class. I can't even begin to explain it, honestly ...
Well, maybe I can, but I really don't want to.
( Private. )
( Private to Lilly. )
Rebecca -- I guess we're partners for this English assignment. Write your own ... play, or whatever, right? Uh ... I'm a little fuzzy on the details. I don't mind the writing, but the whole acting it out part might be my downfall. Anyway. We should meet up, and work on some ideas. I like to be proactive with homework and get it done early, but if you want to take a more relaxed route, that's fine. I'm not exactly ... full of ideas on the project, either, which makes it harder.
In other news, I was thinking about the fact that I haven't really been talking about Isono lately. He objects to this. I feel obligated to share a picture, because he's twice the size he used to be.
God, isn't he massive? I swear to god, one morning, I just woke up, and he was twice as big. It's hard to believe that he's still less than a year old. Note his pleased expression, and the slipcover on that couch. That is his couch now. Nobody else sits there. Nobody else would fit, honestly. Not when he's in it, anyway. And I know the collar looks pink in this lighting, but it isn't. His collar is red. It must have been the flash or something...
And yes, you might have noticed that stoner smile look is his forte. It's weird, I know, but that's pretty much his only expression, unless he's passed out. He also loves to wear sunglasses... As in he will pick them up, carry them to the closet person, and sit there until you put them on for him. Maybe he's light sensitive, I don't know. But I wish I had a picture. It's pretty classic.
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| 9 - And even when your hope is gone, when everything is wrong |
[11 Oct 2009|02:48am] |
This is really like a horrible horror movie gone completely wrong.
Seriously. If it were a movie preview: "A town full of people, half of which have changed memories, possibly more. A crazy doctor using them for his nefarious schemes. And oh, some zombies, too." I wouldn't see that movie.
And now I'm stuck living it.
Having a lack of communication or any real way to entertain myself is hard. It leaves me a lot of time to think. And to sleep. As for that second one, my mind is supplying stuff for dreams that doesn't make a whole lot of sense.
Like...
A really bad drawing of a dragon. Seriously. It's terrible. Someone without hands could have done a better job. It's was blue. And ... silver? I'm not sure.
Or ... this ... guy. It's hard to really explain him. Absolutely massive, resembles a brick wall, dressed in a suit and a tie, and he always has sunglasses. I think he's supposed to be intimidating but there's something about him that makes me feel safe. I don't know. That sounds strange, doesn't it?
There's this strange group of people. Some of them have questionable hairstyles. How is it possible to have star-shaped hair? I guess I'm one to talk, because whenever I see myself, I have hair long enough to make Rapunzel jealous.
I always see myself as really young. Like ... Elementary school young.
Then there's this briefcase. I don't really know what's in it, just that it's important that I don't lose it. It's kind of heavy, but I don't know ... for some reason, I like to carry it around.
There's a girl ... she has short hair, and blue eyes. I always see her looking up at me, shouting at me to run. It's like ... she's trapped, somehow. She seems so familiar ... she was here, wasn't she? I hope she's okay ... ugh. She's a dream. Of course she's okay. As okay as a figment of imagination can be, anyway.
And trust me, there's more. Most of the rest of it are really fragmented. Just pictures that I can't make heads or tails of. A really long coat... Or this ... this man. I don't know, I didn't see much of him, but ... I know that I don't like him. And that I'm scared of him.
What the hell does it all mean? Is this just a side affect from all the stress...?
I guess that makes a certain amount of sense.
The stress has kind of been hard on my appetite, too. I can't really explain it, but I am never hungry... And I have a hard time keeping anything down. I'm sure the malnutrition helps me sleep all the time.
I just wish we knew what was going on. Or ... why they are doing what they are doing. None of this makes sense. It's like a giant puzzle, and we're missing most of the pieces, plus we don't know the image we're trying to make, and it's grayscale, and instead of pieces to fit together they're just little tiny shards.
( Private to Guy. )
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| SCREW THIS. |
[03 Oct 2009|07:58pm] |
I'm not going to sit here and watch all of this anymore.
I'm going back to my parent's apartment. I don't want to watch all of these people get sick, or worse. Especially not my own brother.
I want to be in a place that reminds me of my family. A place that feels remotely secure. Not like this hospital.
And yeah. I kind of want to be alone.
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[28 Sep 2009|07:33pm] |
Monica ...
What happened to you?
That thing ... and that ...
the blood was everywhere, and you attacked that orderly ... you would have attacked me too, wouldn't you?
What the hell is this place? Where are my parents?
God, we're all going to die, aren't we?
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| 8 - No one is gonna take me alive, the time has come to make things right |
[19 Sep 2009|05:09am] |
...I don't know what is going on. Everyone on these boards are ... kind of losing it. I can't even figure out if this is some kind of ... bad joke, or something.
So I'm going to be a recluse and ... stop reading all of this stuff.
There are a few of you that could benefit from medical or psychiatric evaluations. Seriously. You guys sound really, really crazy.
Get yourselves some help. You will feel better.
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| 7 - Go around a time or two, just to waste my time with you |
[31 Aug 2009|05:54pm] |
Good news: College is a lot easier than I thought it would be.
Bad news: Apparently, my face is so magnetic that it has been printed in the online newspaper. Twice.
( More. )
I can only hope that they will stop posting pictures of me ... I mean, sure, I said that they could, but geez, not every single time you publish the paper. My mom loves it, though, she complains that she doesn't have enough pictures of me.
In happier news, training Isono has been going well. I've taught him to sit, stay, roll over, lay down, shake hands ... he also loves to play with frisbees. If I could throw them all day, he would be chasing after them. He has doubled in size since I last posted his picture. I should try to take a picture of him now. He is still a hog when it comes time to go to bed, though. I didn't mind him in the bed when he was smaller, but as it is now, there's hardly enough room for me.
All in all, nothing much is going on with me. What else is new. But I am glad to be out of highschool and into my college classes.
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| 6 - He's born a liar, he'll die a liar. Some things will never be different |
[23 Jul 2009|11:21pm] |
Two weeks from tomorrow, I'll be eighteen years old.
Supposedly eighteen is a big number. Stuff happens when you turn eighteen. You're an adult. You actually mean something to the world at large. You go to the big boy prison instead of juvy. You can vote, if you actually care enough to follow politics. In some places, you can even gamble.
And in two weeks, I'll be that old.
Birthdays are achievements that feel like you didn't really earn them. After all, the only thing you did to get there is not die, and that isn't as hard as you think it would be. We human beings constantly strive to survive.
Hn.
I was at the university the other day, signing up for classes. I have decided on the best tech degree they had, Computer and Software Engineering. My mother is thoroughly disappointed I didn't go for a law degree. She says I'm good enough at arguing to be a great lawyer, but. I can't claim I'm interested in law.
Guy. Were you even half serious about letting me move in? If not, I need to look into a dorm room. Or a really, really cheap apartment...
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| 5 - I wanna be in a museum, stuffed and in a realistic position, Like I'm hunting. |
[22 May 2009|04:35pm] |
Oh, highschool.
It's only been three years, but god am I happy to say goodbye.
Graduation is sweet. Even more so a year early.
I would say that I would be back in twenty years, but as if I care about a reunion.
The only flaw in my perfect graduation would be that I was not Valedictorian. Figures that they chose the pretty girl instead of me. But I'm not going to let that bother me. I'm not a hot chick, so what can I do about it? The world tends to cater to pretty females. Sucks to be me. So she was class president. Whatever. My grades were better...
Thank god that I convinced my mother that I didn't want a graduation party. They're overdone, and if I really want to eat cake, I will go buy some.
Now I have three months of summer to enjoy before I begin my next bout of institutionalized education. I'm just as excited as I sound, I assure you.
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| 4 - It starts out easy; Something simple, something sleazy, something edging past the edge of reason |
[22 Apr 2009|05:42am] |
I have no idea who you are, SKA, but you are going down.
Someone had the audacity to kick down my high score on PacMan. I'm not sure exactly who, but this annoys me immensely.
Enjoy your 15 minutes, SKA. Because that is all you will get. I will not allow this injustice. I'm going to put my score back where it belongs, and has been for the last month or so.
...Right after I'm out of class, that is.
( Delivered to one Liza Garland. )
In lighter news, anybody want to go to the arcade? Around 3:45-ish?
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| 03 - Turn out the light, and what are you left with? |
[25 Mar 2009|02:10am] |
Apparently my scores qualify me for a free ride to Harmony U. No, I'm not surprised. Who doesn't go to Harmony U. My mother is terribly excited, as she's always wanted me to be a lawyer. No, I wish I was kidding.
In other news, Isono is the most affectionate dog I've ever met. I think he would lick my face off if I gave him the opportunity. He also has an infatuation for knitted items? Is that normal? He collects every last knitted thing in the house and hoards them under my bed, randomly dispensing them to family members as he sees fit.
I'm not sure if this is endearing or a sign that the dog has mental issues.
And that's it. I don't feel compelled to write a small novel.
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| o2 - Reminds me of childhood memories, where everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky |
[02 Mar 2009|10:28pm] |
Apparently, my mother was very upset that I was snowed in alone during the blizzard. And for some reason, she felt compelled to make it up to me.
I think she's overreacting.
I have no idea what to do with a dog. Especially not a puppy. Especially not a puppy that will eventually be gigantic. How do you train these things? Is it good when they lick you? What am I supposed to do? I have to go find a copy of Dogs for Dummies.
Shizuka, do you have any idea how to take care of dogs?
I don't really get why people are recognizing folks in the paper. I mean, sure, one of them looks familiar, but who are you to say you know them? Passing someone on the street, running into them on accident, or noticing them on the bus does not mean you know them.
Other than the dog, I don't have anything of much interest to report. What can I say, I'm a boring high school student.
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| o1 - If I leave here tomorrow, would you still remember me? |
[05 Jan 2009|11:28am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 blah |
] |
After a long vacation, heading back to school could be considered akin to torture. Nobody wants to be there, everyone's half asleep and teachers are a little hung over, and we're all left grumpy as hell. Thankfully with my sparkling personality, I made it out okay.
Hey, Luke -- how was your first day back? I didn't get a chance to see you, so I figured I'd give a little shoutout here.
Mom is heading for a breakdown, I think, Alessa. She hasn't stopped cleaning for days. She makes five course meals. If dad doesn't get home from his business trip soon, I think she's going to crack. I mean, I'm not going to lie, I appreciate the folded clothes and five star cuisine, but I'm starting to worry for the old girl's health. She can't take this amount of stress.
And frankly, I'm starting to dislike the smell of Pine-sol.
This journal system is very interesting. To be connected with all the other people in town is quite an idea. Think about it, do we really want to be able to find every last person in town? Like, the guy you stole a taxi from, leaving him in the rain late for a meeting. Do you really want him to be able to find you?
I know I don't.
Anyway, for those of you who are into this whole thing, I'm Mokuba. That's as much of a name as you need right now. I don't want any crazy stalkers coming to my house. Though, if you did come, my mom might take you out with cleaning supplies and great homecooked meals.
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